RYAN IS REMINDED OF WORLD WAR 1.
Looking at the beautiful poppy fields, I see bursts of red, and I imagine what this place would have looked like during the war.
BANG! Guns firing.
BOOM! Explosions fill the air.
People charging at each other with bayonets at the ready.
The wounded lie in heaps all over the muddy ground.
The screeching of artillery flying overhead.
Sergeants screaming orders at their troops over the earsplitting noise.
Machine guns rattling from one side of the field to the other.
Blood soaked soldiers clambering up the hillside.
The clatter of their equipment crashes together while they run.
Lest we forget.
Wow! What a good piece of writing. I loved how you talked about WW1 as I didn’t know it was a big topic in New Zealand. It’s so cool to see how people know about this stuff. I don’t really think there is anything wrong with this piece of writing. Great imagery and onomatopoeia. Love it!
I loved how you thought of the word red as in WW1. This story made me remember to think about them and it gave me a clear picture in my mind! Great job Ryan!